woodland soul

May came with a burst of inspiration. During first days of the new month I found myself drawn to my sketchbook, filling the pages one after another with my own adaptations of famous art and movie scenes. That is an incredibly soothing activity to simply draw other’s creations in my style, instead of coming up with unique ideas. You can compare it with a forest walk. It is much easier to follow a track than trying to find the way through the bushes with a half-working compass. You can have a general idea where that will lead you, but you will never make sure where you will end up.

At the end of April I discovered linocut and, on the contrary to painting, I quite enjoy coming up with unique ideas, whatever comes to my mind while carving. That’s a complete opposite of what I’m used to: single-color designs, a pure definition of “less is more”. Such an interesting exercise to learn myself to simplify as much as possible. And yet, to stay focused on details.

Having inspiration to create means also a lot of sitting by a desk, and even though I love the process, I started longing for changing my environment entirely. To reset my mind and forget about everything – from daily responsabilities to short-term goals (especially now, when I’m just in the middle of preparing a shop update, which is mentally exhausting). I booked a train and drove 600 km to the sea. Two days filled with listening to the sound of the waves, hiking the coastline’s woods, and simply recharging my inner batteries. That was all I needed.

As nature woke up from its long winter sleep, after the snow melted down so flowers could bloom, so did I, from the creative point of view. First months of the year were all about a break and slowly taking steps back to my casual artistic routine. But this time without putting too much pressure on myself, just letting the imagination flow on paper, no matter of the result. And this way I discovered a whole new world of filling sketchbooks with quick, raw pencil ideas – neither pretty nor aesthetic, without the aim of sharing them. Just for fun’s sake.

As cheesy as it sounds, that literally changed my life, or at least the way I look at my own art. I suddenly stopped worrying – and only then I noticed I never should be worried about creating, how had I even developed that “creative anxiety”? I looked back and realized I tended to unnecessarily worry too much while working with watercolors. Just imagine, you’ve been painting a detailed illustration, and all of the sudden you ruin (at least in your inner critic’s words) the whole piece with just a bit too much water. That frustration slowly led to kind of a fear of even starting.

That meant I needed to go back to square one and reminded myself why I actually started creating in the first place. The answer was simple: for sheer joy of creating, on changing a white sheet of paper into a story. I opened my sketchbook and promised myself nobody’s going to see it. It clicked. And slowly, page after page I’ve regained my confidence.
Meanwhile I started being curious in art as I hadn’t been in a long time. I felt the need of discovering something completely new, something I could feel like a beginner again, something that would be a challenge. I went to a local art store and came back with a set of gouache.

And eventually that mix of sketching freely and learning a whole new medium has changed my days entirely. I create more than ever before and there seems to be a flood of ideas in my mind. My interest of other techniques has grown as well and soon I’ll be giving linocut a try, something I had a scarce knowledge of and actually never thought about doing – so that’s a perfect reason. As experienced on myself, it’s never good to keep being closed within one box.
That’s my spring so far, full in blossom.